“I work until it's late, walk in and close the gate
I look in the window and I gaze at my face
Every line and every abrasion
This took my life to make
This took my life to make
On my own, no poison in my bones
On my own, this is where I build my home”
My Home – Ellie Goulding
It’s funny how you sometimes feel like you are
on one long vacation. Even though it’s home now it doesn’t quite feel like home.
Apartment, job, friends etc. Even though it’s all the things I had in Denmark
as well; it’s not quite the same. It’s a new apartment, new job and new friends
and there is nothing old in between. There is not one old friend to remind you
of something funny you’ve done or to talk about old memories. I think that is
the reason that it’s not giving you the real “I’m home” feeling. You’ve got
nothing to remind you of the things you used to have, well except from maybe the
Internet and electronic devices.
My guess is at some point I’d have been here
long enough for it to not feel like a vacation anymore. For the things I have
here to feel like home. At some point I’ll have created memories here that I will
not be able to share in the same way in Denmark.
Sometimes it feels like a dream and you don’t
really know when you are going to wake up and be back in Denmark again. I like
the feeling. It’s what makes it all exciting and it’s what makes me wake up in
the mornings and think: I’m in Poland!
I have survived the longest week ever. It’s not been a bad week it’s just been a really long week. It feels like every day at work was doubled. However the funny thing is that yesterday when I went to bed I was actually disappointed that I wasn’t going to go to work when I would wake up in the morning. I think I am slowly turning into a person who lives to work and not the other way around. I mean I went to bed at 8 on a Friday because I didn’t know what else to do and I was tired. Is that even normal?
Tonight I think I need to go somewhere. I cannot go to bed at 8 again because I have nothing to do. But my question is: is it weird for a girl to go to a bar alone in Poland? Feel free to answer me if you know the question.
The thing is that it takes a lot of courage to even go out alone, but I don't want to go out by myself if it's going to make me look like someone who doesn't have my shit put together.
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